"I Am Proud To SayThat I Am a Feminist"

I am letting go of things to make room internally and externally. Large parts of me want to hold on to everything, still not trusting that what will eventually fill the space will be sufficient.

I've managed to throw out my old baseball and softball trophies, academic achievement plaques and activist awards. I've never hung them on walls so why start now. I'm keeping my old journals and letting go of old papers.

I was intrigued by this particular piece of writing I did when I was a junior in college. I see myself embracing new concepts today the same way I passionately embraced feminism in my 20s. I like to be part of a community that does good. That community seems to change over time, the need does not.

The original title for this essay was "An Ongoing Painful Process." I've renamed it for this blog post and have discarded the original.
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I was brought up in a family that didn't dissuade me from participating in activities that were normally thought of as unfeminine. Hence, it was a huge surprise for me when, at 15, I was denied a job as a stockperson because the owner felt that that type of work was not appropriate for females.

This job incident along with being labeled a tomboy most of my pre-adolescent years, clearly and early pointed out to me the bias people have about what is appropriate male and female behavior.

I always felt that such narrow stereotypes were wrong and I felt stifled and a misfit because I wasn't allowed to do what I did without it being pointed out to me that I was acting outside of the appropriate female gender. For example, one day I playfully wrapped my arms around my brother's waist and proceeded tp tackle him. My dad told me to stop it because I was acting "unladylike." I wasn't supposed to be aggressive because that was outside the range of appropriate female behavior.

I didn't personally know any other women who had gone through the same experiences and feelings with whom I could talk.

It wasn't until one year ago, when I was talking with one of my professors, that I was exposed to and introduced to a whole way of looking at the world in terms of women's experiences. This paradigm, much to my surprise, is feminism.

I had known and liked this professor for a few months when during one of our conversations, she labeled herself a feminist. Right then I was forced to redefine what I thought a feminist was.

I originally thought that a feminist was an angry woman who went too far with this equal rights thing and hated men and maybe was even a lesbian, and thus was to be feared and avoided. My definition was very narrow and only included some of the characteristics of some feminists. Where I got such a definition, I may never know.

When I finally forgave myself, I went through a year of talking with and reading about women and men who are feminists (Yes, I learned that men can be feminists. Actor and director, Alan Alda, is a prime example).

There are men and women who live as feminists yet do not label themselves as such. The labeling of myself as a feminist was a tough decision for me. I decided to do it because I do not believe that a person can be neutral. Everyone has biases and prejudices. Trying to deny this is in itself political. In labeling myself a feminist I am being proactive. In doing so, I get a chance to define what a feminist is instead of someone with a narrow definition of the term labeling me first.

The neat thing about labeling myself as a feminist is that I feel a sense of being hooked up with a larger cause and feel that I am working for a public good. That public good is the eradication of the oppression of women and the changing of attitudes of those who believe that women are less than human beings.

Feminism takes many forms. The guidelines are loose and are defined by the individual. The common recognition of all feminists is that all women: women of color, white women, heterosexual women; and lesbians are oppressed. The source of this oppression culminates in the traditional attitudes that women are inferior to men and from our male dominated and male oriented culture.

As a feminist, I work on changing people's narrow attitudes about the "natural" role of women and men. I am constantly explaining what I mean about being a feminist. Many men and women think feminism is merely the advancement of women and a stride for a reverse in the current status of women in which women would become the oppressors and ment the oppressed. This is not the case.

Not all women who've recognized that they are oppressed choose to politically declare that they are feminists and work on a day-to-day basis to eradicate this oppression. Even fewer men will admit to this oppression and then choose to become active feminists.

I choose to do so because I think it is necessary to raise people's consciousness and then think about their definition of feminism. Although the revelations I've had that have led me to see the terrible inequality and subjugation of women have often been painful, I am proud to say I am a feminist.